Monday, May 2

I'm so glad God is patient

If you hear God's voice, it's best to listen.

I loved my job in Germany. I keep saying that I'd go back in a heartbeat but then every time I've thought about going back into the dorm assistant position, I feel if I'm moving backwards in life. I've reflected on this from time to time with no clear answer. Anyhow, back in March, I believe, I saw that another boarding school, in Malaysia, was hiring...and they pay their staff...and they needed an dorm assistant. SOOO....I thought and thought and finally gave myself permission to apply. I figured I could always do this again for two years and then maybe move into another living in Asia would be kind of cool (okay, not cool-temperature because it is warm and humid there, I've heard, but understand). So I went online and printed up all the reference forms and then started the application.

However, just as I start the application, God breathes "just wait."
Well, I couldn't wait! Hello, the deadline for the applications was the end of I needed to get things wrapped up before my vacation! My rationale was that I figured I'd go ahead and apply and then if needed, I could always tell them "no thank you" later on. However, if didn't apply, then it would be a no-go from the beginning. Make sense?

So I filled out their essay-question application...all 15 pages of it. Requested all the references from the four required people. Requested the transcripts from all my colleges (3 as of now). Mailed it all in and waited. Then when I was on vacation, I made arrangements to skype with them, which I did. We had a nice hour long chat. This was all fine and good, until the end of the chat.

At the end of the chat, my friends asked me how it went and if I'd take the job, if offered. All I could say was "...I don't know..." All I felt was this great uncertainty over moving into that ministry, into that location, and into that school. I started praying about it (novel idea!) and the uncertainty remained. Two weeks later, the lady there emailed asking for a final couple documents to complete my application. I emailed back saying...thank you, but sorry, please don't consider me.

Clearly, I should have obeyed. I knew that I had heard God's wasn't even one of those times where I was uncertain (was that Him or was that just me?). But I chose to act anyways. I wasted so many people's times, including my own, on the possibility that God would say "haha, just kidding, glad you didn't listen to me...go ahead and take the job."

So let this be an encouragement to you (and to me!) that if you hear God speak, it's better if you just obey.

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