Monday, March 5

The stupid topic of contentment

So, the ladies' ministry at my church is doing this new thing, this year, offering 4 extra "classes" on various discipleship topics. The first was Silence and Solitude. The second was Scripture Memorization and Meditation. And this past Saturday was Contentment.

Although I went to the first two classes, I had no desire to go to this class and would have probably skipped altogether if the lady in charge didn't contact me to see if I would make the coffee for this gathering. I said yes (because I had nothing better to do, really) and went, knowing that this topic was probably something I needed to hear but didn't want to hear. Anyone with me on this?

(**Side note: It's snowing right now and there's a huge smile on my face and joy in my heart! If only it would stick...**)

Because you see, back on Valentine's Day, not even a month ago, I wrote about being content in my singleness. And while I am still (more often than not, at the current time) content at being single, the one area I am NOT content is my job and the direction of my future; because I'm ready to leave my current job and have no earthly idea what is next in my life.

No earthly idea.

In fact, just yesterday, I was chatting with a woman at church and told her "if you hear of anything, let me know..." to which she naturally replied, "well, what are you looking for?"   Umm...yeah...I have no clue.

I didn't leave the class full of employment-contentment but as expected, I did leave convicted and challenged. The Lord, the same One who has called me and who has led me to this job in the first place, rebuked me regarding my attitude toward the job and various elements that frustrate me. His calling has me here, for this time, for His reasons. One very good reason would be to be a Christian example of integrity and love to my two non-Christian coworkers! And yet, last week, I was two steps away from chewing someone out in a very ugly way (see last post).

It occurred to me in the last week that I should pray for "my enemies" (aka the people who frustrate me) and I figured that God probably wouldn't change them as much as He would want to change me, since that's now He normally works.

So yeah...that's where I'm at. Back at work.
Trying to humble myself to God's will.
Trying to allow God's presence to shine through me.
Trying to love.
Trying to be diligent with the gift (job) God has given me.
Trying to allow for contentment to grow.

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