Sunday, August 11

bittersweet.

He leaves today. After months of training and instruction. Changed. Strong. Healthy. A leader. Proven and trusted. Ready and excited. Ready to once again be a son, brother and friend. Ready to resume his education. Wanting to thrive. I thank God for this young man and feel overwhelmed with pride and joy.

I send him out. With hugs, prayers, a note, and with reminders of my love. I urge him to come back for a visit. Knowing that my arms will want to hug him. My eyes will want to see his face. My heart will want to hear him. But while his leaving is good, and after all, the goal of the program, I find my heart breaking.

Tuesday, August 6

Connectedness

I love(!!) the book of Ruth, in the Bible. If you want to get me excitedly talking, ask me why! But since I can't hear you, I'll tell you why! Yes, it's a romance story for all us swooners and day-dreamers, even though I'm sure Ruth would have hardly called that part of her life romantic, when she was going through it. But the romance is not what I love about it.

What I love is God's handiwork.

Boaz grew up in a home where his mom (Rahab) was also a "foreigner" who wanted to know and follow God, and was then welcomed into the community by Boaz' dad (Salmon). He probably grew up watching people react differently to mom, who in addition to being a foreigner was also a former prostitute, and also watching his dad love and protect his wife. This life scene prepared and shaped Boaz for his own wife.

God brought, into his own fields, a young foreign woman, who wanted to know and follow God. And while foreigners had been known to be abused, Boaz quickly tells his workers to protect her. I think immediately his heart went out to her, not only because he heard that Ruth was taking care of his cousin Naomi, but also because she was humble foreigner looking for a way to survive in this new land.

I love the fact that long before Ruth existed or even Boaz existed, God was at work...preparing and orchestrating. Since all of time is but a moment to God, He worked in Rahab and Salmon's lives, which affected Boaz and Ruth's lives, and then these "simple" stories set the scene for King David and even Jesus, Himself. All the same family...all individuals used by God to accomplish His purposes.

Years ago, I took a Strength Finders test. My number one strength is Connectedness. I can see how the past, present, and future are connected. All of it is important because all of us have a role to play. Spiritually, it is easy for me to understand this strength because it allows me to marvel and what God has done, is doing and will do! Plus, it reassures me that my simple life is part of something much greater than I can even fathom. Personally, in regards to work/ministry/general life, I'm still learning how Connectedness can be an asset to myself and others. I suppose I can try to be a voice of hope to others that their lives matter and count for something, even if they can't see it.

Thursday, August 1

Treasures

There's a Bible verse I have thought of a couple times while being here in Mexico:

"But Mary treasured all these things and pondered them in her heart" Luke 2:19

This verse occurs after Jesus' birth and a crowd of shepherds came, almost as if drawn in by magnets, to see and worship this new baby. They also shared about the choir of angels that told them of Jesus' birth.

I have thought of this particular verse because there have been a few key moments where I have fully understood this verse. Like today. And yet, there is a part of me that fears I will forget the treasures. I have such a poor memory. Details get fuzzy and then my stories become long as I try to figure them out while talking. It can be quite humorous.

But today, this sweet boy asked me if he can call me Mama.

Even hours later, I want to weep. Weep because I'm so touched that he asked and that he wants to call me Mama and that he is offering his love to me. Weep because my heart has longed to be a Mama forever, and now there is a child who wants to call me (ME!!) that.

But I also want to weep because I know that he has recently been rejected by his own mama, and I DO NOT understand how a mama can do that. How can a mama tell her son that she doesn't want to see him ever again...that he can live at the Oasis Boy's Home until he's 18 (4 more years) and then be left to fend for himself? What happened to cause this sadness? I have no answers...all I can do is pray for healing within this family.

But in the meanwhile, I want to treasure the gift that I was blessed with today. I wanted to write down this gift so that the details don't become blurry or forgotten altogether.