The Gift of Singleness?!?

I subscribe to Relevant magazine. Having received all of two issues so far, I'm finding it interesting although I'm not convinced yet that this will be renewed when the time comes. But I want to share with you a small part from the May-June magazine, from the article Stuff Christians Like: Sometimes Faith is Funny, by Jonathan Acuff. Thankfully the below scenario has never happened to me outside of the one guy asking if I'm going to be a nun! But this sure had me laughing...enjoy!

Telling Other People That Maybe God Gave Them the Gift of Singleness

     He didn't give it to me. I'm married, thank God, which I can totally say in this context because I am literally thanking God for something He gave me, which is a wife. It's weird that He didn't give you one, though. Maybe He does want you to be lonely, I mean single. Like Paul. Marriage isn't for everyone. Not everyone gets that gift. Some people, yourself for instance, get cats instead.
     Or dogs. God seems like He's more of a dog kind of guy. And that's not so bad. Dogs are nice, you'll have a lot of time by yourself for puzzles and your tea will last twice as long. Think about that. Whenever my wife and I have tea, we waste two teabags. Think of the savings in tea you'll be enjoying, and you'll never have to pick a side of the bed to sleep on. You have both sides to choose from and no one ever elbows you.
     I bet you didn't even consider that. Good thing I'm so insightful, which is another gift God gave me. He gave me more of a "spiritual gift basket" than just an individual gift. I got marriage and happiness and kids and joy and love, but you got the gift of singleness. Like Paul. That's great. Seriously, I'll pray you'll be willing to embrace it and not shriek every morning when you awake that gift is still sitting on your doorstep. That's what I would do. I have nightmares about being alone sometimes. But that's your gift.