An interesting vacation...of sorts

My silence is due entirely to the fact that I am on vacation and at my grandparents' house. My grandparents do not have internet at their house. Or a DVD player. Or an answering machine. Or a coffee machine.

That's right...a vacation without coffee...
I want to say that it hasn't been affecting me but even as I write this, I'm wondering if that is true.

(As for the internet, we have to log into an unsecure internet connection from one of the neighbors, which means that I could lose at any time...which means that the longest I've had connection since being here has been a total of 30 minutes approximately. Lovely!)

Overall, my time with my grandparents has been good. My grandpa and grandma are my only remaining grandparents and are good for conversation...they're cute people. Plus, while their house may lack some elements that seem "normal" to me, the state of California, abounds in good eats, like In-N-Out Burgers and El Pollo Loco. In fact, my sister jokes that the only reasons to come down here is to eat and see my grandparents.

In addition to seeing my grandparents, my sister arranged a girls-family-dinner with my two aunts, three of my cousins, and one of my cousin's kids. It was nice. My family has always been somewhat disconnected, it feels, from our California family. I haven't grown up close to any of my relatives and that saddens me...so I enjoyed the time we got to spend it laughing and chatting as adults and as family because it doesn't happen enough.

The only slump to this whole trip has been my internal system. I don't think it got the memo that I am going on vacation and this is a chance to relax. If anything it seems to think that it needs to get all high-maintenance on me, which hasn't been so great. On Tuesday, I was presented with diarhhea and vomiting. On Tuesday, Wednesday, and today, I have had migranes. And lastly, yesterday and today...constipation. I know this falls under "too much information" and I apologize for just putting it out there. But seriously! Either my body is out of whack from the lack of coffee, hormonal-girl issues, or too much sunlight and not enough grey clouds. Regardless, this isn't normal and not how I wanted to enjoy my vacation.

Thankfully, besides Tuesday, my body hasn't limited me from too much of the low-key excitement going on around here.

Well, I made it this far...I better not push my luck since my internet is bound to cut out sooner or later. I'll post again when coffee is flowing in my veins once more.

Time on my hands

I just looked at my last post where I talked about doing Beth Moore's book club thing because "I will have time on my hands."

Oh geez...

I suppose it's all relative but between yesterday and today, I no longer believe that I'll have time on my hands. None. Whatsoever.

I will indeed be out of school until the middle of May and then that class goes until the beginning of July. Then I will be out of class from then until the end of August. The rest of the year, I'll be finishing up my Master's degree...woohoo!

However, during my non-school times, I have many great ideas and plans on what to do with my time.

1. In August my class will be all for my thesis paper...so I want to get a head start on it so that come December, I'll be done. So I have 10 books to read, that's I've already purchased, and will need to figure out some way to categorize my research.
2. Red Cross Disaster Training...I have no idea how long this training might be but it is something I would very much like to do and something that could benefit me in almost any country or situation.
3. TESOL certification...I found this online place which sounds credible. It's a work-at-your-own-pace situation. Again this would be good in almost any future country or situation. I could easily do this program but the good time for me to start would be immediately and finish before my next class in May. My "conflict" is that this time would be a good time to start my thesis.
4. Plus, I signed up to do some extra teaching at my youth group and for another youth group. So I'm already committed here.

The last thing I want to do is overextend myself. And at this moment I haven't started any of the three options but what do I do? I suppose I could try to do the TESOL and thesis paper at the same time. Disaster training can wait, I guess...

Life keeps moving.

I went in for one and came out with three

I went to the bookstore after work today
to buy this:

Beth Moore just released this book yesterday and will be doing an online book club type of thing with any sisters that want to join. Basically I have nine weeks to read the book, during which time there will be online discussions. At the end (April 24th) Ms. Beth is going to do a simulcast online (I think) to wrap everything up.

I don't think I have a huge problem with insecurity but I know it does affect certain elements of my life, especially in regards to future career plans. At any rate, I thought it would be good to read and to participate in this book club thing since I'll have the time off of school.


So on my way to the checkout, my eyes found two more must haves:

Jane Eyre by Ms. Bronte...the story I formerly disliked...isn't this an awful cover though?

And lastly:

Pride and Prejudice by Ms. Austin....a story I love. I was tempted to also buy Sense and Senseability since my sister likes this book as much as P&P...but I figured I should hang onto a little bit of money.

Needless to say, I spent a little more than I planned.

A German Memory (in English)

There are a fair number of people who want to see me get married as much as I would like to be married. I love their support and am touched when they share their wishes and prayers for me.

When I served in Germany, I worked with approximately 14 middle school students who, God bless them all, wanted me to get married. They tried to encourage me to "hook up" with another single younger guy there. They talked about their distance single relatives. I smiled, I laughed, I rolled my eyes. Until one day...

One day, someone brought up that Aunt Mindy (which is what everyone called me) should join a dating site online. So a number of those blessed teens ran over to the computer and went to Yahoo's or MSN's dating page (I think) and started filling out a profile. I was nearby so that I could make sure they wouldn't hit the "submit" button or see inappropriate profiles. The little dears filled in the information they knew about me and made up what they didn't know. Then, they got to the page where you can choose what qualities or features you want or like in the opposite gender.

Would you believe that my kiddos found the one trait that nobody on this dating site had ever yet chosen...they decided I had to have a man who's best feature was a "hot bellybutton." Yes, it's true...under best features was a "bellybutton" option. We all started laughing hysterically.

Sad to say, there were zero options.

Bruises, Blessings & Busyness

Have I ever written about the two years I spent in Germany? If I have, it was probably in regards to my kids there or my travels and nothing more. I worked at a boarding school. My role was to take care of the kids while they attended the school...I did all the things that parents would for their kids: cook, clean, help them with homework, tuck them in at night, drive them to school, play, discipline, and love them! I loved my ministry. It was the best job I've ever had thus far! It was also the hardest two years of my life.

I'm not going to get into details. But I came home from my two years feeling quite bruised. My church dropped the ball in receiving me home and so, besides my immediate family, I felt I had nobody and became emotionally withdrawn.

I've been home from Germany for 4 years now and I feel that over the last year and half, life has been breathed into me once again. It has been a lot harder to "re-open" myself up than it was to withdrawl. The process of "re-opening" myself has made me feel more emotionally spastic.

Anyhow, this past week at my church was mission's week. One of our guest missionaries was the dad of one of my Germany kids. It was wonderful to see him again and to catch up with his family. What I did not expect was last night.

Last night, I was hanging out with my friends, Brian and Erin, and Mark, the missionary. At one point during the night, Mark looked at me and said he had a big question for me. He proceeded to ask me to talk about my two years in Germany and asking specific questions about how I felt about this or how I reacted to that. **inhale, exhale** I talked and talked and talked. He listened, encouraged, and breathed a blessing over me.

I went home (and woke up this morning) thinking over and over how much of a blessing that was to me. It is one thing to share the bruises with those who didn't see that part of my life but it is another thing to share with someone who understands. I am still basking in the unexpected blessing. But having talked/relived those experiences has also left my heart feeling bruised again.

I expect those bruises will always be imprinted on my heart, to some degree.

One message I have been hearing this week, both from the missionaries and from God, is that God has a plan for me. I have a phone call scheduled with the a key person next Friday, the 12th. My last couple conversations didn't go so well, in my opinion, so I want to make sure that I am ready. I want to spend some time early next week, thinking through who I am, how God has made and equipped me, and what I can offer in ministry. I have some work to do. But first I need to get through this busy homework week...no rest for the weary...at least not until Saturday, the last day of class.

**Today starts my February challenge: walking or running 4 times a week. I did really good with January's challenge except for this past weekend. I forgot to take home my water bottle and just didn't drink enough water.